Tag Archives: wedding

Thirty days

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Ok that’s the most wedding-y picture I have available that isn’t actuality part of wedding surprises.

We have 30 days left until the “big day”. I feel like I should be more stressed, or maybe just more outwardly stressed. Instead I know I’m clenching my teeth at night because my jaw is starting to hurt. I have a plan and that makes things better but I can’t sleep at night because i’m double checking the list in my head for things I can’t forget. During the day I’m not breaking out into hives or losing my hair so I count that as a win.

I feel patronized when I talk about the wedding. They talk about being a “bride”. Really, I’m planning a party. I’d much prefer to go with “hostess”. The wedding stuff is the easy part about this whole time. Wonderful OtherJ, witnesses, master of ceremonies for the ceremonial part, words to say in front of everyone, warm and squishy words for his eyes only, and a party at the end.
I feel like bride is a derogatory word at this point. Apparently people grow another head or sprout horns when they are engaged. Maybe it has to do with the horrible notion of a wedding being the “bride’s day”. No. We have had equal input and equal responsibility through this planning process. I’m better at making lists (or adapting them) and setting up the organization, but i suck at making a decision.

Though I have not heard words about it, I am sure that we will get all sorts or talk because we’re moving into a house now. Yes we are getting married and moving to an adult house. We are renting a house . It happens to be after a long battle with noisey neighbors and an extra long drive to work. But because we are also getting married there is some chatter.

We have gotten the “when are you having kids?” and “you’ll understand when you have kids.” Some days it is harder than others not to laugh at these questions. No plans for babies, active plans to prevent babies at all costs.

We are down to thirty days until the party and official ceremony. I’m ready and we can do this. I’m also ready to get on with life and find a new project to play with. I think I’ll be ok with just going back being a person, potentially with a different name.

Music – The Cousin Project

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We’ve been making a list of songs we like for the wedding. OK so not just songs we like but couple songs that both of us like. We have 12 so far. We will probably think of more if we sat down an went through our music. We will do that later.

For the wedding we don’t want our kinda out-there music tastes to be the only ones represented. OtherJ had this great idea to get all of the cousins (I have a bunch) involved by having them help pick out music for the day. Songs they like, preferably own and want to share.

Yes, it will be an all day event for some. Picnic early afternoon more of a game night starting around dinner. All are welcome but the family friendly low-key version is the picnic. Later is for all the family friends and their munchkins to come over and celebrate with us. And all this time we need music. Lots. Of. Music.

I think that will be the wedding update this weekend, just have to work out the kinks with OtherJ.

oh the sillyness

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My new found obsession is weddings… and on one forum this make me damn angry to read “…clich√© stag party, with everything that can happen when you’re intoxicated (and everyone knows you do stuff when you’re drunk you would never do sober…).
No no no… no. They are the same things, you just blame them on being drunk. It impairs judgement, but you would have still had that thought sober. Hell you may haven even done it, but found a better way to cover it up. Don’t be that stupid. If your SO cheats on you at his bachelor party its not because he’s drunk. If he gets arrested because he came on to a stripper too strong, it is not because he is drunk. Don’t be stupid.

Speaking of bachelor parties… http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bachelor_party :

A bachelor party (Canada, South Africa and the US), also known as a stag party, stag night or stag do (especially in Commonwealth countries and Ireland), a bull’s party (South Africa), or a buck’s party or buck’s night (Australia), is a party held for a man shortly before he enters marriage, to celebrate his “last night of freedom” or merely to spend time with his male friends, who are often at his wedding party afterwards. A bachelor party is usually planned by the best man or other friends of the groom, occasionally, with the assistance of a bachelor party planning company.

Increasingly, bachelor parties have come to symbolize the last time when the groom is free of the influence of his new wife.

HAHAHA, really please work on your relationship if this is what your bachelor party represents. IF they had said something about the increased feeling of responsibility of having a “new” family then that would be less stupid and far more logical. Maybe its because we already live together and for the most part in daily life function as a family already and the level of influence over each others lives may increase a bit, but we are not currently free of influence over each others lives… at all. That’s just silly. Hell, even my friend who did not move out into her husband’s house until they were married had more influence over her husband’s life than that article would suggest.

Dear otherJ: If you are thrown a bachelor party (or similar event) by your friends, please go see boobs if you want, or sit and play video games with a bottle of whiskey. Have fun, don’t get arrested or killed, and I cannot drag you up the stairs if you pass out somewhere random – so try not to.

Distance Planning

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We’ve been “planning” our wedding since way before we became engaged. Just storing away ideas that we liked because we knew it would happen eventually (he wanted to make the proposal perfect). We’ve had the same general idea for over a year now so we are going with that. It fits us and our lifestyle and our family so it it still a wonderful idea. The problem is that my grandparents are old. Grandma has heart problems and Grandpa is in the early stages of dementia they are both almost deaf. We live 800 miles from them (and the rest of my family) and it is really important that they be there.

I had to call and tell Grandma twice that we were engaged because she didn’t hear me the first time. OtherJ decided though our current plan was great, that it would be more practical to have the wedding where my family is. That would mean that only his family would have to travel (they would have had to anyway) and that Grandma and Grandpa could definitely be there. Since we’d had everything planned out on where now we’re starting over finding a venue.

I recently went to visit my parents who took an entire day to drive me around to take scouting pictures of parks. (Cause they are awesome.) They are going to be by eyes and ears for this alot of the wedding. They’ve even gone out to new destinations while I’ve been back home and sent me pictures to scope out. I am hoping that the rest of my family will do the same on their outings to the area parks this summer when the leaves have return.

Short Vacation

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This past weekend we rented a car, packed up the demons and drove to MI for K’s wedding. Interesting ridiculous that happened along the way. 1) Flat tire the day before the wedding, which had to be taken in to get fixed the day of the wedding. 2) stripper pole on the party bus 3) got flashed by a groom’sman’s wife/girlfriend not sure 4) random hugs and weird handshakes by people i’ll never see again in the receiving line.¬† OK that may not be interesting or ridiculous, but still weird.

Friday: left at 5am, had dinner with parents @ 7pm.

Saturday: Nails at 11:30, rehearsal at 3:30, rehearsal dinner afterward, the top of my dress needs to be sewn closed before Matt’s wedding so my boob will stop falling out.

Sunday: Getting tire fixed, getting ready for wedding, wedding, pictures, more pictures, reception at fancy pants hotel, sleep

Monday: bunny food and beer purchasing, dinner with family, pictures of charlie chaplin building, slurpy stop, looking at old pictures with family

Tuesday: drive home

Wednesday: recovery.