Category Archives: randomness



How do you pick little charms to represent yourself, your life, your hobbies, interests? How do you narrow down a theme to get to the goal? Do you have a goal? If I pick all the little charms I like, it ends up being a jumbled disjointed mess. Nothing matches, pieces are seemingly random, there isn’t a coherent thought and its all tossed together like a junk drawer. Something are probably usefully but can you get to them through the things that are not.



In the early morning on Christmas day we picked up my sister from the airport. It was a surprise for our parents, because her schedule kept changing. We all slept at the hotel so that we didn’t wake anyone in the middle of the night. When morning came we asked the parents to hide in their room and J3 in hers, walked the big present into the living room and hid my sister under the tree with it.


They didn’t notice her at first but eventually everyone cried and a good Christmas was had. With almost all of us in the same house.

Part of me was dreading it. My sisters and I have strange relationships. J3 sees me as Mom #2 and as a teenager that has got to be infuriating. I try most of the time to control my urge to chastise her or remind her about some responsibility. I don’t succeed most of the time. I didn’t talk to her about why talking about money in relation to gift giving is rude. Not all of our family is as well off as we are and mentioning how much something cost or who paid for it only makes people feel bad or obligated to match the worth in some way. And this goes both ways. I should have but I’m not sure it would have been well received. It probably isn’t my place anyways. I’m still working on figuring out what that is.

J2 and I grew up together and are far enough apart in age that we fought like crazy. Close enough that we always had a playmate and to get into trouble in our late teens. And then I moved away. We are polar opposites in alot of ways and very similar in others. We didn’t become adults together. I think we actually spent most of the last 10 years not talking. Not on purpose I don’t think, but just not.

The day we were leaving my parents we went to Ikea with my dad and sisters.
In the frames and mass produced artwork J2 and I started talking. The other pairs or sisters we know, that she knows, are alot closer than we are. She was wondering why that is. I don’t think I’d ever thought about it before.

The only things I could think of, at least with the sister pairs I know was age (most of them are only a year apart, and they are in the same parts of life at the same time) and the fact that for the most part they have become adults together. In our adult lives we have never been in the same location. I was out at school, in California, in North Carolina she was either back in Michigan, in the military all over the place or Japan. And with our age, there were alot of things during that time that we experienced that were she was just starting a journey when I was finishing it.
I don’t know that being in the same place to would have helped much day to day, but at least the maturing wouldn’t have been so jarring because we would have seen each other more often and had the opportunity to do stupid things together. We could have been at each other’s weddings and know how to read each other’s bullshit better.

And then I put a basket on her head and we made jokes at the expense of an entire culture, cause we are jerks.

I don’t want to be like my mom and her sister who barely talk and don’t know anything about the other’s life. Neither of them would have any idea how the other felt, all of their memories of each other are 20+ years old and they are both different people now. Maybe if one had had more influence on the other they would be more balanced people. But then again one could have made the other balls out crazy.

As a rule I don’t like NY resolutions, cause they are stupid and if you’re going to change something you don’t need a date to start, you procrastinating lazy ass. But I don’t think this counts since we already talked about it. It’s just a beginning.

2015 is the year to be a better sister.

Life is Good Day


In 2002, we made up a holiday. It with two college freshman. As can be expected they were barely starting to figure out the whole “adult” part of life.
It started with a list, trying to remember and keep present with why Life is Good, and ended with an adventure.

I believe that we’ve acknowledged the every year since and sometimes the number when we really need it. The past few years have been rougher about this time of year.

But every year we still acknowledge how greatful we are for our lives and how they have turned out, cause in 2002 we were young and a bit crazy. (as everyone that age tends to be.) Maybe we made up our own anniversary because we needed to celebrate our friendship because it was one of the biggest constant support at the time. And now even though we’re hundreds of miles apart we can celebrate how far we’ve come together and apart. It’s the rough times when we need it, so taking the time to celebrate makes it easier to remember life is good.

❤ you Sexy girl.

No sugar day 3


Food challenges are dumb. They are and I want a donut. Which is why No added sugar is my new food challenge. No other reason than to see if I can do it really.

Rules are simple to remember, even if they are hard to enforce.
1) no added sugar – this means reading labels and no sugar in my coffee.
2) no fake or substitute sugar – also reading labels and no mixed  drinks with coke zero
3) fruits and veggies that naturally contain sugar are fine, especially if you buy them in their raw forms

Now I don’t add sugar to many things as it is, but after looking at labels, it’s in a ton of things. Tomato soup?
Breakfast is a bitch and there are exactly two (cold) cereals at my usual grocery store that do not have sugar. Looks like I’ll be eating Puffed Wheat and berries for a month. It’s also a good thing that I like oatmeal and veggies.

I am also not starting out cold turkey. I was half way through a box of cereal when my week started, there was a half full jar of pasta sauce and a I did not check the dressing of my vegan pad Thai last night. I’m not keen on letting food go to waste so those will be used up before using alternatives with no sugar. I’m not sure if I’ll worry about bread if I want a piece or a sandwich, I doing eat much and we purchased super low sugar bread as it is. I’ll decide when it comes time.

These past three days have not been bad. But right now there are free donuts in the break room and I really want one. 23 more minutes of work and I think I’ll succeed in not eating one.

Chickboxing week 5


Another week alone, but with my full knee brace I did not walk out in pain so Yay! I’m getting more into the groove but I am really distracted if one of the instructors stands in front of me trying to show me whatever move we were doing. It’s much easier for me to focus on the front of the room and the music, they’re just too close.

I still have no sense of rhythm.

Week 3&4 Chickboxing


Week 3 was good but I really screwed up my knee and ended up wearing braces for the next week. Part of me was also disappointed that my partner in crime seemed to be looking for any excuse to give up in the middle of a session. I get being tired and winded and not being able to follow along, but it felt like overkill. The constant disparaging comments also didn’t help.

Week 4 my knee still hurt so skipped Chickboxing and went to the Sexy stretch class. It certainly hurt, but was definitely something I’ll do again. Apparently there is some things I’ve been doing wrong in yoga.

Today is week 5 and I’m back to Chickboxing with my full knee brace. Hopefully that will make a difference. The hubs would prefer if I could go hiking this weekend.